~ Refined and reposted from 2011 archive
Ok, admittedly, I’m not a huge fan of Valentine’s Day. Ever ornery, I resent being guilted into expressing my love by corporate greeting card money whores. Forced to say “I love you” their way…on their day. Everywhere I look…cheesy cards, heart-shaped candy, and the foolproof red rose…guaranteed to make her shed her clothes. Apparently. “V” day could possibly be the most pressure inducing holiday of the year. He’s feeling the squeeze to romance her, lest she be the only “unloved” girl alive who will secretly plan her vengeance on some random day when he feels all is right with his all too romantically challenged little world . And, in appreciation for his romantic efforts, she feels pressured to give it up, lest he be the only “unlucky” guy alive, who will surely wither under the duress of an under-utilized appendage. He’s sprung for dinner and a gift…and he’s sprung yet again.
Forced to stalk the aisles ablaze with red and pink lovin’ necessities, we buy (literally) into the holiday hype for fear our sweetie will feel unlucky in love. Scrambling frantically, and at the last minute, through hundreds of replicated pledges of love, we’re mere puppets at the greedy hand of the greeting card industry. Five bucks to express someone else’s feelings and look the other way when the moment has passed and those feelings are tossed into the trash? Creativity is dead, it seems. A homemade card created from the heart is not only more romantic…it’s a thoughtful one-of-a-kind gesture, and you can be sure that thousands of other people aren’t pretending to love the same exact “gesture” while wondering if their heartthrob searched for hours on end or just grabbed the card nearest the exit route from the store. But hey, if retail giants say these token mass produced impersonal gifts will get you laid, who am I to argue?
But I do.
If cards, candy, and flowers were sure to set his sheets on fire with hot lovemaking (which is the true motive behind his romantic whim), you can bet the calendar would be inundated with more dreamt up “romantic” holidays. One competing with the next on its panty dropping ability. Men everywhere would make a daily pit stop at the local corner store to stock up on the “sure thing” card, candy, flower trifecta. The male consumer population would redefine the term “convenience store.” A quickie mart for the quickie smart.
Obviously love is more complicated than that. While it’s nice to be romanced on Valentine’s Day, we want to feel loved, supported, and appreciated every day of the year. After all, there are 364 more opportunities to show affection…and to get some. Attentive appreciation provides all the ammo our sweeties need to combat those 364 days chock-full of life’s not-so-welcome little surprises. Fickle and unforgiving, life is unpredictable on a good day, hostile on a so-so day, and a downright bitch on a bad day. Presented with twists and turns, ins and outs, ups and downs, we come face to face with everything life throws our way. The good, the bad, and the ugly. And through it all, we want to know that our one and only will stand by our side. That we can depend on that love, rain or shine. Dependability plays a vital role in relationship success and is rated one of love’s most valuable commodities. We want assurance that the one we love is there to catch us when life tosses us aside. We want more than a lover. We want a best friend.
Studies show that the happiest and most successful couples are also best friends. A best friend is there when life is good…dancing and playing alongside us in life’s blindingly sunny rays of happiness. A best friend is there when life is hostile…showing us a single ray of sunshine amid life’s ominous rain clouds. And, most importantly, a best friend is there when life is a bitch…standing right there beside us providing shelter in the eye of the storm. And when that storm passes, a best friend dances with us in the puddles, dries us off, and helps us move on.
On life’s sunniest and stormiest of days…we want a shoulder to cry on, a friend to rely on, and a lover to get it on.
No more holiday hype.
On Valentine’s Day, on a good day, on a bad day, on THIS day…be the best friend your sweetie needs.
Say “I love you” your way…every day.
Love when love doesn’t come easy.