When it comes to sex, men seem to prefer beauty, boobs, and booty to brains.  Apparently, these are the qualification indicators for “high bangability.”  But, what boosts a man’s ego even more than “hitting” the hottest of the hot girls?  Her orgasmic talent…in a nutshell, if and how many times she climaxes.  Nothing makes a man feel more like a man than hearing her tantalizingly moan, groan, and make a “touchdown” in the end zone…over…and over…and over again.  But what he doesn’t know is that her ability to provide him that satisfaction is directly related to her emotions.  That rather than searching out that bodacious babe he has stamped in his mind who scores a 10 on bangability, he should be searching out an emotionally intelligent woman who will repeatedly validate his virility.  Of course, there’s always the chance he may find all of these qualities in ONE woman…if he can accomplish that, not only will he have every other heterosexual man’s green-eyed monster to contend with, but he’ll also have the “How to…” book market cornered. Men aren’t the only ones “standing at attention” at the mention of orgasm delight…women are even more interested in achieving the multi-orgasmic shudder-fest.  After all, it’s her world getting rocked.  He simply gets to enjoy the tremors.  So, what do our emotions have to do with our “bangability,”  and how do we convert it into “bangable bucks?”

Studies unanimously find that women with higher emotional intelligence (EQ) have better sex and more orgasms.   Yes ladies, intelligence pays…and it pays big…in the form of orgasmic currency.  EQ doesn’t refer to book smarts, ACT scores, or typical IQ scores.  So, your beautifully framed honor’s graduate degree from Harvard, your impeccable SAT scores, and your 4.0 average are all useful assets…on a resume…but of no use to you between the sheets.  Between the sheets, it’s your emotional intelligence that’s running the show, as well as the reruns. 😉

What exactly is emotional intelligence?  It’s a woman’s ability to accurately identify, accept, and convey her feelings to others…as well as identifying the emotions of those around her.   A highly emotionally intelligent woman is very much in touch with her feelings.  She is able to identify and utilize her own emotions (as well as those around her) to correctly solve emotion-related problems.  She is able to successfully combine her feelings with her logic and make a sound decision based on both.  Because she is able to recognize and convey her feelings to her partner, she’s likely to tackle relationship problems head on, rather than brushing them under a rug, suppressing them, and hoping they’ll never again rear their ugly head…lest she’ll stomp them back into the emotionless, orgasm deprived crack in the floor…where they belong.  She’s able to scan the faces of those around her and assess their feelings and thoughts.  Because she easily perceives emotions in others’ faces, she’s more aware and empathetic to their feelings.  She is also more adept at telling her partner what she likes and doesn’t like in the bedroom.  Who knew being bossy in the bedroom translated into “O, O, O?”

Women most in touch with their feelings experienced twice as many orgasms as their more inhibited girlfriends.  Studies also found that emotional intelligence isn’t determined by nature or genetics, but by nurture .  When sets of twins were tested, in every case, one twin tested high on EQ, while the other tested average, or low.  The twin rating highest on the EQ tests experienced more frequent orgasms and reported higher sexual satisfaction…obviously.  Because it’s said to be determined by nurture, we’re not stuck with whatever emotional intelligence we presently have.  It’s possible we can work on our emotional intelligence by focusing more on our feelings and effectively communicating those feelings to him.  Did I just hear every man moan in anticipation?  🙂  We can work to enhance it, or we can suppress and ignore our feelings… along with our orgasmic potential.  So, it seems sensitivity pays for women…and indirectly, for men, as well.

Men love to hate women who are overly in touch with their feelings, as it usually implies that he will also be expected to “share” sooner or later.  His idea of getting all touchy feely is, as we all know, not equivalent to her idea of getting all touchy feely.  But apparently, both versions will head in the same direction, eventually.     While he may not want to participate in the emotional commentary, he’s certainly eager to take credit for his sex partner’s “triple-header.”  After all, he really knows how to please a woman.  The proof is panting right in his awed, gratified face.

If we women learn how to use our emotional intelligence to our advantage, enhance our orgasm frequency, and rock his world, we could possibly reconstruct the “bangability” scale.   Too bad multiple orgasms aren’t advertised as readily as beauty, boobs, and booty.  But, let’s say a man is surveying his frequented gym…not for the perfect weight bench, but in hopes of triangulating the most “bangable” hottie within a 50 foot radius.  He’s found two such girls…both similar in physique and beauty, both wearing tight t-shirts while working the treadmill.  One girl’s t-shirt sports the Old Navy logo.  The other bears the bold words “Multiple Orgasms” with an arrow pointing south.  Which girl will he choose?  hmmm.  I wonder.

We know that men are visually stimulated.  Now, if only we could advertise our emotional intelligence with the same enthusiasm as our physical attributes, the possibilities would be endless.  And we would undoubtedly convert our EQ into “bangable bucks.”   Spend them wisely…redeem one orgasm at a time.

“Feel” your way.

Chick Hughes

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